Spending Freeze Day 8 : I Had Chick fil A.

Well. We failed. Kind of. But I give us grace so hopefully you will too.

It started on Friday (spending freeze day 5). Emery was taking a nap, I was doing my blog thing and Jonah was sitting across from me playing with play doh like a boss. I was feeling good. Look at me working and keeping my kid busy without tv. Win. And then I heard Emery start to stir. No big deal. He was babbling to himself. Totally content so I didn’t get up right away to get him out of bed. Cause just look how peaceful and wonderful things were. Why would I want to mess with that, right?

Spending Freeze Fail

Well that was my first mistake.

I didn’t notice when he got quiet again. I’m not sure how many minutes passed before Jonah said, “mom I think we should get Emery now.” Well that’s a good idea. Let’s get him. When I opened the door, the smell hit me like a wrecking ball. Poop. EVERYwhere. In his hair. Under his fingernails. All over his legs. In the mesh of the pack n play. I’m not exaggerating when I say it was everywhere. It was in places I didn’t think you could get poop. I screamed.

That was my second mistake.

Freaked him the hec out. I took him to the bath, both of us screaming, and sprayed him off. Got him all nice and clean and smelling good. He calmed down and seemed to be enjoying being in the water, so I decided to fill up the bath a little bit and let him play while I scrubbed poop off my arms.

That was my THIRD mistake.

Jonah came and stood by the bathtub and was playing with Emery. Or so I thought. How long does it take to wash your hands? 30 seconds? Tops? I’ll tell you how long it takes. It takes just long enough for your three year old to empty a bottle of shaving cream all over your 10 month old and rub it into his hair and all over his freshly washed body. So yea.

By 11:30am on Friday, I was done for the day. I called Zach and said “I don’t even care. I’m going to Chick fil A. I’m not making lunch for these fools.” And so we met him for lunch and I didn’t feel guilty about it.

But the thing is, once you break a spending freeze, it’s way too easy to keep breaking it and so that’s what we did until Monday. I had a pumpkin muffin while I worked on blog stuff at Panera. We ate Panda Express because when your blog goes super mega viral it’s kind of overwhelming and a pinch stressful and Zach wanted to help a sister out. But he doesn’t cook so we went out. (That’s not true. He does cook. But it took him an hour and a half to make scrambled eggs the other day, so…no.) So basically I have a lot of excuses, but maybe no good reasons.

And there you have it, folks. I have failed you. You may throw your stones now. Or don’t. Because we’re back in the saddle again! I went grocery shopping so now there’s zero extra dollas to make me HOLLA. Man. Why is it so hard not to spend money?? I’m trying. Really, I am. But my default when things get stressful is to take the quick and easy (and expensive) way out.

I’m a self medicator, for sure. Any ideas you might have to help me deflect my eating and spending habits elsewhere would be greatly appreciated!

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Comments

  1. One thing that sometimes helps me is I calculate how many hours of work will my husband need to work in order for us to get that one take-out meal. (We have five kids so we can seldom eat out without spending over $20-30!) Getting out of debt is our ultimate goal and I am trying my hardest to not let my wants deviate our plans. Easier said than done when I have an unhealthy addiction to McDonalds caramel frappes…
    Deanne recently posted…The Problem With OpinionsMy Profile

  2. I say job well done instead of you failed! Life got stressful, you adapted, and you put yourself right back on the path you want to be on. That’s huge. You didn’t let it snow ball out of control before you reeled it back in. No stone throwing here. I say “High Five!”
    Kristy recently posted…Grow into it.My Profile

  3. Just an observer says:

    “But he doesn’t cook so we went out. (That’s not true. He does cook. But it took him an hour and a half to make scrambled eggs the other day, so…no.)”

    “I have never…not once…talked poorly of Zach to anyone.

    Yes, I’m bragging.”

    Proverbs 16:18
    Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

    • Stephanie says:

      When she says she won’t speak poorly of her husband I believe she means she won’t say things that tear down his character or demean him. I don’t think he would mind her admitting it took him an hour and a half to make scrambled eggs. He would probably just laugh about it.

    • Oh my lord. Are you kidding? Please tell me you’re kidding. If you’re not kidding, please kindly find another blogger to poorly use scripture against. But thanks for the LOL.

      • Just an observer says:

        No, I’m not kidding. And no, that was not a poor use of scripture. You bragged on the fact that you won’t bash your husband(pride) and I feel what you said wasn’t exactly an uplifting way to speak about your husband(fall). I even showed it to my husband in case I was just overreacting and he said he would not be very happy if I said that on the internet for everyone to see. I wasn’t trying to be mean, I was just giving an outsiders perspective and was trying to show you that maybe you shouldn’t be very critical of your husband’s efforts to cook and be glad that he even tries. I started following your blog after your viral post about letting your husband love you. In it you spoke about how hard he works for you and your family and the least you could do is show him affection when he comes home, and I totally agreed with you on that. But part of showing him you love and appreciate how hard he works is by giving him praise even when his efforts don’t always work out the way he or you plan. (Not saying you don’t praise him at all but we as help meets need to remember to praise ALL their efforts.) Trust me, I’m speaking from experience. My husband use to cook once in a while but most of the time when he did cook it was always stir fry. Well, I made the mistake of joking when he said he was going to make dinner and would ask if he was going to make stir fry again. And just like your husband he would laugh it off, but you know what happened after a while? He stopped cooking altogether and I totally blame myself for that. I’m just trying to warn you that what you say might bother him more than you realize or more than he lets on, and that goes for more than just cooking. Just choose your words wisely because you might be “bashing” him and not even realize it.

        • This is silly. She didn’t say “Zach is the worst cook ever nd should give up on life because he is a big fat failure.” She joked that he took an hour and a half to make eggs. And he LAUGHED. What you see on the blog is very SMALL portions of their life. Maybe you need to stop judging their marriage and start focusing on your own?

        • Gabrielle says:

          Just an observer, the thing you need to understand about Kristen is that she’s a funny gal. You can see it in her writing. And you better believe her husband thinks she’s hilarious. He said so in the question and answer video. I don’t speak I’ll of my husband either. I don’t say anything that will tear him down or make him feel inadequate. But I poke fun at him. A lot. Daily. And you know what? He thinks it’s HAI-larious. That’s what she’s doing here. You have no right to judge what she says as pride OR fall because you don’t know her. You don’t know her husband. And you sure as heck don’t know their relationship. You seem to like scripture but maybe it’s time for you to read a little more. Last I remember, Christ doesn’t like judgement.

        • You know… in bashing vs teasing, it’s a VERY situational and personality-dependent thing. I’ve learned during the (oh, so long) 1-1/2 years of being married: there are things that some wives joke about their husbands that to THEIR husbands is just hilarious, but to MY husband would be bashing. And there are probably things I tease my husband about that to him is hilarious, but to other husbands would be offensive. It just all depends on the personality of your husband and yourself, and VERY hugely, communication!!

          It sounds like your husband needed to communicate with you that he didn’t appreciate your teasing about his cooking, and that your response to Kristen’s joke about her husband’s cooking was based on your own bad experience with teasing and accidentally hitting a sore spot with your husband, rather than on Kristen’s relationship with her husband.

          So, y’know. We all need to remember that everyone is different, everyone has a different sense of humor, and we shouldn’t assume that someone else’s marriage relationship and sore spots are the same as our own.

          Besides which, unless you know Kristen personally and she’s asking your advice on whether something is appropriate or not, I believe it’s her husband’s job to guide her spiritually and point out her flaws with (loving) words and scripture references. Not ours. :)
          Kristina @ Eccentric Owl recently posted…Eating IntentionallyMy Profile

        • If you had posted your second comment first, we might have been able to discuss this calmly and without hurt feelings and without my readers and friends (I freaking love you guys) feeling like they needed to come to my defense. But your first comment was super rude and judgmental. Your second comment wasn’t much better, but at least you explained where you’re coming from and I totally get what you’re saying, but that’s your marriage and your relationship. Not mine. I mess up in my marriage a lot. I hurt my husband a lot. I don’t need anyone else trying to point that out. But this isn’t one of those times that anyone was hurt. I can’t even believe we’re discussing this right now. It seems as if you’re just trying to build a case against me, and I don’t feel the need to defend myself over something as silly as scrambled eggs. There are better ways to use sacred scriptures than to pick apart a stranger’s blogpost on the internet. Using it as a weapon IS a poor use of something that is supposed to be life giving. I live and breathe the word of God. Don’t try to use it to tear me down.

          All that being said, I think we can close the conversation now. Words on the internet don’t always come across as they were intended, and I don’t want this to become an attack “just an observer” thread. You do you. I’ll do me. That is all.

          • Jen C. says:

            You do realize that you’re describing your thoughts and feelings to the internet, right? You can’t expect everything you put out there to be loved 100% of the time. It’s really a huge turnoff to watch you acknowledge criticism with such a bad attitude at every turn. I enjoy reading your posts, but who you are above and who you are below seem to be a little out of sync.

          • I can assure you, I’m the same person. I’m sorry I’m coming across as something different. Sometimes I can take the heat, sometimes I can’t. That’s just the way it is.

    • Darci says:

      I’m pretty sure that teasing your husband about something he does that’s funny isn’t the same as talking poorly about him to people. She’s allowed to tease or pick on her husband, in fact, she has a license for that. He put a ring on it, obviously, and I bet he has no problems with her sense of humor.

      • Just an observer says:

        Oh you’re absolutely right that they can pick on each other. But I think that when there is an effort made on anyone’s part to do something, that’s when I try to keep my mouth shut. I guess after the whole stir fry incident I tried to turn the situation around and thought to myself “How would I feel if he joked to me about making one of my go to dishes…again.” But no he keeps his mouth shut and is just happy that dinner is on the table. lol.

        • Gabrielle says:

          Honey, this isn’t your marriage. Maybe you should revisit your issues with YOUR husband?

        • Darci says:

          When someone is genuinely trying to help a situation, you shouldn’t tear it down by being mean about it, no. But she was just kidding around with him. Like, he tried, but it did take a long time. And when she talked about how he took them out to eat, she said “He was trying to help a sister out.” She acknowledged that he was doing a good thing, and that he meant well. She wasn’t making it seem like his efforts were unappreciated.

          Plus, maybe Zach doesn’t care that his cooking isn’t gourmet, and he knows that. He’s probably just happy to be of some help and knows that since he is in a marriage with someone who’s funny, that he’s going to get teased a little here and there. I don’t think something as little as a joke about his cooking will make his heart bleed. Just sayin.

          And if something like that bothers someone, they need to go to their significant other and discuss it with them. In which case, I’m sure these two have no problem doing with each other.

    • Jordan says:

      As a Christian, I find it very offensive when other “Christians” use scriptures to degrade or judge someone else. Don’t be an internet troll.

  4. amanda says:

    I’m sorry I have no helpful words of encouragement on being mindful of a budget but I wanted to share that when my son Jonah was 2.5 and freshly potty trained during his nap time he pooped ALL OVER HIS ROOM. And not a little bit. In had to throw toys away and borrow my mother in laws carpet cleaner. It was a disaster. Here we are 3 years later and your story makes me laugh thinking about it!!

    • Oh my goodness!! Our Jonah’s are the same. When he was potty training, he told me he needed to poo, went to the potty, sat down, SCREAMED, and took off running through the living room dropping turds all over the place. Hahaha.

  5. Sarah Gilbert says:

    Poo happens, toddlers and poo everywhere happens! That’s when I started to always put on pants or bloomers over the cloth diaper, it took me two poos to think this might me a good idea…

    Don’t feel guilty, well feel guilty for a minute and then keep your eye on the prize! HOLLAND!

    Heck yes to blogs going viral, God is good!

    • I don’t know what I was thinking! Stinkin aplix diapers that are easy to remove! LOL. I learned my lesson though. Sadly.

      YES. Holland!!!!!

  6. sounds like you deserved chick-fil-a to me, seriously! I’m pretty sure all mom’s have had days like that and they suck, but man o man they’re fun to look back on and laugh. ha
    Whitney recently posted…Deep Dark Silly Blogging Secrets.My Profile

  7. kate" says:

    I just found you and I already love you. Ah, motherhood. It’s not for the faint of heart. Thank you for the smiles and deep appreciation in your words followed by my “me, too.”

  8. Kayla O says:

    Kristen,
    I’ve been a silent observer of your blog since January, I love it!! What you say I relate to almost daily, I’ve gone back and read some of the previous posts as well.

    In regards to this post, your not a failure since you got back on track right away, something my husband and I struggle with.

    To the person who is being so negative and trying to twist and throw Kristen’s words in her face, shame on you. Being a fan of Kristen, her family and her blog, I can clearly see that Kristen and Zach have a fun, comical relationship, where teasing, poking fun and laughing with each other is fine. It shows in the Q&A video they made, even in the photos a couple weeks ago that Zach was at a fancy lunch for work and Kristen is sitting there making pancakes with a towel in her hair. That all being said I’ve been on the receiving end of someone being critical of my marriage when they had no right, after reading that comment the feeling I had when it happened to me flooded back but for Kristen’s sake, and honestly I don’t know her personally, I know her from reading her blog. My mom always taught me if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all, she didn’t mean don’t have fun, and take life so seriously that we need to be so dang critical of every word someone speaks aloud, or types.

    Much love Kristen! I can’t wait for the next post. I have gotten many ideas from your blog for keeping my little one occupied, which will be oh so helpful once my husband and I decide to have another baby!

    K

    • Well don’t be silent anymore, Kayla! I love hearing for you people. And thank you so much for your sweet words. You’re the best.

  9. Oh man. The DAYS I have to look forward to! Haha! The poop days… man, so glad Asa is only four months old and hasn’t figured out how to play with his poop yet. ;) But I’m glad you can laugh about it later! And no, totally not judging at all. I am pretty sure that when this happens to me ( because it will. Kids have a way of always making things happen that you say will never happen…) I’ll be calling my husband to get takeout, too.

    xo
    Kristina
    http://www.eccentricowl.com
    Kristina @ Eccentric Owl recently posted…Eating IntentionallyMy Profile

  10. Elizabeth says:

    I heat ya, who doesn’t want just.one.thing. to be easy? I totally self medicate that way too. One ofbthe things I’ve done to help with that when I’m tempted to order food is to take an evening and stock the freezrr with easy pull-out-and-heat food.

    • I really need to do that. I hear some people have freezing parties where they all get together and share ingredients. I need to find some of these people to motivate me!

  11. It took 4 kids before it happened to me, but with #4 the “poop thing,” happened twice. He will now wear a sleep sack to bed every single time he goes to bed until he’s (5??) even if it’s 90 degrees outside :) Not dealing with that again!!
    Julie@teachinggoodeaters recently posted…Letting Go, and Letting Kids Create in the KitchenMy Profile

  12. I def don’t blame you for getting lunch after that mess!!! Sometimes you just need that little escape from reality! No one is perfect. Just learn from your mistakes and move on girl! As far as hubby and scrambled eggs… it’s ok that it took that long if he didn’t burn anything. Me? Anytime I use a frying pan, I burn it and the pan has to soak for a week!!! ;)

    • Oh no!! Hahaha. Maybe stay away from frying pans? Or get some non stick ones! haha. Zach’s actually a really good cook when he wants to be. He makes a mean rice and beans. mmm. so good.

  13. Quincy says:

    Recently found your blog and have been stalking your old posts ever since. I really appreciate that you are talking about finances and some of your spending weaknesses on here! I know it’s personal but it’s nice to know I’m not the only one and it encourages me to pay more attention to what I’m mindlessly spending my money on and where I need to tighten things up a bit (cough chipotle cough). Also, love this idea of a spending freeze and the totally doable three week timeline. I will bring it up with my husband soon and hopefully we can try it too. :)

  14. Misty says:

    I just started following and I have to say, I love your posts!! Each and every one!! They hit so close to home for me!! Thank you very much for taking the time to blog and share your experiences. I look forward to reading your blogs. :-)

  15. Props on making it to day 5!!! Don’t beat yourself up about it! It’s an admirable goal AND stress needs to be dealt with so that it doesn’t boil up inside.
    I hope your days are going considerably better :) And I’m so glad I found your blog!!

    <3 dani
    dani recently posted…A Little Down TimeMy Profile

  16. Rachel says:

    I’m just impressed that you even wanted to eat after all that poop! My youngest had such a horrific smelling poop this morning that I couldn’t eat breakfast and then texted my hubby to tell him we needed an outhouse in the woods for the teenage years!

  17. My husband can make spaghetti and toast… oh and peanut butter and jelly, so when we go on ‘spending freezes’ and things get hectic and I’m all like, “no way am I cooking”, he’s all like, “LET’S DO IT!” and we go out. (and that’s even without poo disasters :)
    KATEsurfs recently posted…No Fighting in Front of the KidsMy Profile

  18. My partner is overly ambitious in the kitchen. He’ll start like fifty-eleven different things and then they all fall apart or don’t really mesh well and it’s like “Well, now what?” I can rescue him sometimes but other times I just need to order Chinese.
    Shary recently posted…That Time I Watched 5 Kids By Myself (Boba to the Rescue!)My Profile

  19. I found that one of the things that keeps me from just buying dinner is having a few easy things around to cook. Even though it may not be entirely healthy, keeping some things around like frozen pizza, chicken tenders, and anything else you can just throw in the oven, is a good way to give yourself a cheap and easy out. The truth is, you’re GOING to have those nights where neither of you wants to cook, so plan on having some easy things around. It might not be super healthy, but is it really that much less healthy than Panda Express?
    Sally recently posted…How You and I Can Do ANYTHINGMy Profile

  20. Christen says:

    I have a wonderful poop story that ends with me carrying a 1 year old through Olive Garden with a ball of poo on my shoe like a pom-pom…. said 1 year old is now a teenager :) Thank you Jesus that eventually the poop stories stop happening. I have loved reading your blog Kristen, it makes me chuckle and smile all the time. Good luck with the spending freeze- it’s cray hard to discipline ourselves but the reward is so great- and usually generational! Our children (sometimes- hopefully- just the good stuff) model what they see us do when they grow up.

  21. Jonia says:

    A friend posted one of your blogs on facebook, so I decided to come and take a look! I’m only 3 blogs on and I’m in love!
    I have a 5 year old and a 1 year old and it gets hard sometimes both of my children have went crazy with poop!! Just this past Monday my child was eating it and I was screaming and trying not to throw up all over her! Thinking back it’s funny but at the time I was so overwhelmed! Knowing other moms are going through the same things lets me know I’m not alone and just because I’m not the perfect mom doesn’t mean the world is coming to an end. Thank you! You are an inspirational writer. I look forward to seeing your blog! (Now going to read all the rest lol)

  22. Courtney C. says:

    This might not work for everyone one, but when I feel like I just neeeed to go shopping I will go to target and walk around the whole store picking up stuff that I think I want. Then I walk around the whole store again and put it all back. It sounds super silly but just going and touching things satiates the urge to spend.

  23. Ashley B says:

    I fully think that calling yourself a failure is far too harsh! We all have breaking points, and it sounds like it was just one of “those” days!! I don’t in any way think you shouldn’t have gone out to eat after all that, but since you asked… ;) My best strategy for avoiding eating out is to have food in the house–things that are easy to prepare (or at least planned, so I know what I’ll be cooking and can prep for it), baked goods, even things I can just pull out of the freezer to reheat. I love making more than I know can be eaten in one meal (I’ve got the mess out anyway) and freezing the leftovers. Sorry for the poo mess…happens to the best of us!! :)

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  1. […] reader base) is that the writers don’t hold back. They post the farts (and sometimes poop) right alongside the roses. They don’t pretend to be perfect, and they make themselves […]

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